It seems some guys just dont know...
April 29 2002 at 9:50 AM
Score 5.0 (1 person)
Akugaijin 


Response to THE POWER MOVE

how to take advice around here. Hope your imbicilic mockery keeps you company when you are sad and alone having left a beautiful J-girl unsure of your intentions.

I, for one am of the other breed. I take sage advice when offered and put the Power Move to the test. I had this beautiful J-girl back at my place... we had just returned from a short walk around the neighborhood and she was still visibly tense from the exersize. "What to do?" I searched. "How can I show her that I am not really interested in helping her find her lost kitten like I promised?"

Suddenly I remembered the POWER MOVE:

I offered her a drink and she nodded confusedly realizing that it wasn't milk I was pouring, and these two chilled Zimas were definately no saucers. (You see I had planned this the night before and called up the local liquor store to find out if they carried this delightful sparkling nectar... and sure enough they did.) I offered her the cool glass bottle and she impatiently accepted, clearly performing her coquettish little "but seriously my cat could get run over" act. I nodded attentively while she played her childish games, but I didnt listen to a word or hardly even notice her point to the door.

My eyes remained fixated on hers ...as I sipped my alcoholic beverage ...as I adjusted the atmosphere by dimming my halogen and switching on my red hot lava lamp ...as I clicked on the stereo and found Seal's pop-hit "Kiss from a Rose" using only my sense of feel.

The mood was now set and her nagging had diminished leaving only a look of confusion and amazement. She seemed mezmerized by the raw power of THE MOVE, the magical enchantment of it, and it showed when she asked "Whats wrong with your eyes?" She clearly must have felt supernatural magnetic forces pulling her into the bedroom. I scanned her up and down, not mssing a detail on her immaculate three foot figure. Actually I bet if you stood her up and stretched out her emaciated cabbage patch legs, she would have been quite tall, but in her wheel chair she came to a cool 2'10". Perfect height, if you know what I mean.

Well, I don't know if there were subliminal signals in the air or if the Zima was kicking in but I realized it was time for action. "Kiss from a rose" was on its third chorus and I had to hurry before that U2 Batman theme came on and spoiled the ambiance. So I did it, I took a long sip of my drink, and slammed it down violently on the coffee table into a neat sea-shell coaster. I wiped the excess droplets from my semi-stache and knelt down in front of her. She tried to roll away but I put on the tire-locks and I think it certainly "bridged the gap of uncertainty."

I tugged the lukewarm Zima from her hand, put its neck between my first and middle finger like you hold a pool cue and took a lengthy chug before walking over and depositing it in the recycling bin, without taking off the wrapper. I creeped up behind her and wheelied her chair back to a 45 degree angle and bent down and kissed her pretty sweetly, and by the wild flailing of her arms I could see that she was in love. That was all I needed for one night, and I promised to invite her over next week so I could cook her dinner and she could use me for my English.

Well guys that was about it... I suppose I could have had something more, but I was a bit too tipsy to lift her from her chair to my bed. I just wanted you all to know that the power move works like a charm and all you doubters can spend the night with Kobe Tai and some KY. Thanks for the advice Randomcow, please share with us some more pages out of the book of killer moves. I am wondering what to do if I have my pants off and there is a naked girl laying in my bed with her legs open beckoning me to come forth. How can I make sure not to send her mixed messages?
 
   
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